Feliz Día De Los Reyes!

Today my family got together to celebrate three kings day! It was really nice to be able to spend time with everyone.

I got to see my niece, she’s 6 months now which is crazy. She’s already grown so much! She’s got quite a personality and she’s such a happy baby.

This has felt like the longest week ever and it’s actually been pretty short. I’m excited to do a lot of relaxing this weekend and prepping for the week ahead!

6/365

Nostalgia

Today I am tired. That was all I was going to say today but then I got hit with a dose of nostalgia tonight when I saw the grass and water under the tree.

Tomorrow is El Día de los Reyes (Three Kings Day) in which we recognize the arrival of the three kings to celebrate the birth of Jesus. In Puerto Rican tradition, much like Santa with cookies and milk, before you go to bed you leave a show box filled with grass and water by your bed for the three kings camels. When you wake up the next day there are three presents left by the three kings. It’s also a day off of work and school in Puerto Rico and there’s a huge parade.

Originally my picture for the post was just going to be the grass and water but then I thought “How can I just post a picture of that and not show my moms awesome Puerto Rican themed Christmas tree?!” She always puts so much work into it, including hand painting the ornaments with different cultural symbols and traditions.

5/365

Time Machine

Today was hard.

I’m normally a very positive person. That one person you know that’s kind of annoying because they try to find the best in every situation? Yeah, that’s me.

For once I feel clouded. I feel stuck. Living in a state where I see the safety and inclusion that’s grown since I was a kid , that I was excited to see, shrink little by little.

My heart hurts. Not for the books. You see, this isn’t about the books. It’s about the kids.

My heart hurts for them. For the kid that in a few years won’t have a safe space anymore. For those kids that are getting hurt at home but won’t get to talk to anyone about it because their parents opted out of mental health at school. I see the world changing and this feeling is so overwhelming, this fog of negativity that surrounds me and only gets thicker the more I think about the repercussions these will have for our kids in the long run. I feel scared.

I want to scream. I want to cry. I want to laugh. I feel so much and at the same time I feel nothing.

4/365

The Little Things

Ever since working at a high school and having to be up early I’ve grown a real appreciation for sunrise. I mentioned yesterday that Jess and I decided on a pitstop in Summerton, SC before finishing the drive today and boy did we luck out with finding a super cute Airbnb, this was the view this morning from the front porch.

Before we started our trek our host Patrik showed us a Schoolie that he and his wife are working on to hit the road sometime this year! The amount of talent and resourcefulness that people have amazes me!

Today I have a bonus picture of the dogs and I just taking a break from all the driving. We are finally back and as ready as we can be to go back to work tomorrow. Are the Tuesday scaries a thing?

3/365

Unplugged…

Tomorrow is supposed to be the first day back at work but Jess and I “spontaneously” decided to stop halfway back home. Perhaps only getting four hours of sleep the night before a 16 hour drive isn’t the best idea.

Normally I work on school breaks. There’s just so much to do and I never understood how people didn’t. This trip I didn’t even click on my work email. For once I let myself completely and totally enjoy my break. I dedicated time to learning new skills, being present, and lots of mancala!

If you’re someone like me and you’ve never just let yourself enjoy break, I highly recommend you do it! Sure I still have to do my monthly January calendar and it’s already January, I could sit here and think about all of the things that need to get done that aren’t yet and it would be so easy to get overwhelmed. Here’s the thing though, if you go to work everyday, you try your best to finish your lists and you just can’t, that’s not on you. Especially my people that work in education. If you are given a job with a million responsibilities and duties and little support to get it done, why is it that as humans our default is to blame ourselves? Somewhere along the line we stopped paying attention to the check marks we place on our lists and have placed all our focus on the empty boxes. Be proud of your check marks, you showed up, you did the best you could, and that is by far enough.

I challenge you to focus more on what you did do and less on what you didn’t. Find the pieces of joy in all moments. Be kind to yourself.

2/365

Two-vy Groovy

I feel like most often when thinking about the new year I focus a lot on what new things I’ll be doing/will be happening. This year I want to think about what I’m leaving behind in 2022. When I think about that three main things come to mind.

Selling myself short. Often times I find myself thinking that I’m not good enough at something or that I’m not applying myself enough.

If it’s not helping me grow, I’m letting it go. Last year I put too much thought/weight into things that negatively effect my mental health.

Being a horrible texter. If you know me you know that I am the WORST texter. I’ll look at a text and think I responded and never did. I’ll be unsure of what to say in the moment and I’ll leave it for later and never look at it again.

Here’s to the feeling of a fresh start and new beginnings! (And finally finishing a 365 project in 2023 haha.) 1/365

Falling isn’t about falling…

It’s about getting back up.

So here I am. Getting back up.

It’s been a few months since we’ve met. This is a common occurrence when I try to commit to something. Perhaps it’s the weight of my failures that has kept me from completion. The common thought of “well, I failed the last time I tried.” I can be all levels of cliché and say, never again, this time I stick to it. You and I both know that the odds are not in my favor. However I’m going to try.

I am unhappy with myself.

I am lost in certain ways.

I am ready for a change.

I. Am. Done.

Oxygen.

What do you do when you feel like you can’t breathe?

When you feel your body counting every atom of oxygen because you aren’t sure when you’ll take your next breath?

Do you appreciate the breaths more?

Or do you find yourself gasping, anxiously breathing in and out?